Time Marches On
Saturday 26 July 2008 at 02:05 amSo Barron's wedding happened today.
Oh my god. I still can't get over this. Well, not that marriage has much meaning to me, but the whole time I was thinking "yeah, nice Mormon shindig" but when I was drinking with Larry afterward, I was like "Shit, Nick got married!"
I pick up Larry at the airport at 6:10, we get to the park 25 minutes early, catch the end of a rehearsal. We met Tammy (Nick's mom) on the way in. She was really happy to see us, since we've known Nick and the rest of the family probably longer than any other non-family member that was there. She was telling us how the whole family (and the groomsmen) had to wait OUTSIDE the fucking temple during the actual marriage. What a slap in the face. Nick ditching his own family like that (haha, me going off on family responsibility like that? crazy!). Tammy didn't seem too thrilled. She was also telling us that Nick is the type of person that if she was a Buddhist, he would convert to a Buddhist, if she was a Muslim, he would convert to Islam. I could sense a bit of.....non-joy in her voice and wordings. I'm sure deep down she doesn't really Nick to marry (especially considering his age and....religious conversion).
We talk to Nick for a bit, and as the ceremony begins, Miller and Logan show up. Saw Logan at the bachelor party and also a couple times in the "last summer" (summer after graduation) but haven't seen Miller since graduation. He hasn't changed at all. We sit together, I take a few pictures, the couple kissed, la de dah typical marriage ceremony. To be honest, the wedding seemed lackluster. Like not a lot of effort was put into it. Probably because it was only a "ring ceremony" and not the real "Mormon wedding." Fucking balls that is.
Pretty much Larry and my conversation that whole time (and with Logan and Miller included) was pretty much re-iterating our feelings about this whole ordeal. We also felt kinda sorry for Barron because he's been waiting to have sex for a looooong time, and this being both their first time, AND their wedding night, it would be....er....disappointing. Being a Mormon, she probably wouldn't be very exciting and kinky. Missionary, missionary, missionary. Haha, we were talking about car insurance to Nick and Larry mentioned that now they are married his rates will go down. I made my usual quip "That's the government promoting pro-creation" and of course Nick laughed. Nick's still Nick, to be honest. If he still laughs at my athiestic cynical commentary that he was so accustomed to in high school, he's still real.
We talked to Kim for a bit. Even Kim isn't that excited about the whole ordeal. She was saying that she was surprised that her brother managed to find someone, let alone get married, and the first one to boot. Can't quite remember, but she made a comment about his former athiesm and how he easily ditched that for her. I'm pretty sure Tammy and Kim are both at least agnostic. I know Zack was a born-again during high school, not sure what Lonny thinks. Ah well.
Holy crap, Kim has gotten hot.
Anyway, we talk to Nick for a bit at different times when he was away from his bride, and chilled for a few precious minutes. He had to comment about me being in all black and that was so typical of me ;) We try really hard to keep what we had going in high school. I wish we can still have it. But that bitch Jillian took it all away. :( He will still live at home for a bit, so that's good. AND HE"S COMMUTING TO OSU!? WHAT THE FUCK? What happened to his ecological sense that I (semi-forcibly) instilled on him during high school? Four hours of driving, every day......so he can stay at home with his woman. Argh.
Man, I hope they have something for their honeymoon. I suggested to Larry that we should buy him some lube and condoms, but Larry shrugged off that idea, saying Barron was too smart for it. I'm not sure....he could easily be suckered into having pro-creating sex. He does not need that. Not now. Not ever. Pleasant Valley will fall because of fucking people being born.
Jillian's dad made an announcement that all the married couples were invited to the canopy to have a dance, and that one by one he would announce that anybody who was married for less then X amount of years would leave, leaving the old couples left at the end. In my brilliant sense of timing and wit, right when everybody was completely silent and you could hear the crickets, I said, "C'mon Larry, let's go up there!"
Oh and Barron is such a funnily terrible dancer, and Jillian is a shy terrible dancer. Not that Larry and I are any good at all. At least Barron has the balls for that.
After it was all said and done, we hugged Nick, and left. Dropped by Larry's house for a few minutes, talked with his parents, haven't really seen them in a year. He changed air filters on his Ghia, then we drove to the Highland Pub and had a pint each. I had a Terminator. Downed it fairly quickly by my standards. We just talked for a long long time. It was good times.
Here's to Nicholas Allen Barron, and hoping you come to your senses and stand up to your woman, forsake your falsified religious affiliation, and have no kids. And encourage your spouse to go back to school. And fucking hang around us more!